Day 114: skip something quasi important to do something more enjoyable

This week being back at work has been a struggle. It was nice to hear clients tell me how worried they were but somehow it hasn’t been enough. Usually my cup gets really full knowing the positive impact my work had on people’s lives but right now I feel like I’m just trying to keep my cup from breaking.
Yesterday I did a huge purge and clean of my workspace in hopes for some rejuvenation but I still don’t feel anything. All day today I did what I had to do and nothing more. I felt really down and shitty for no identifiable reason. I know that something needs to change in my work but I don’t know what. While I was off sick I was starting to feel really good but as soon as I got back to work it all disappeared. I feel anxious, I feel depressed, I feel nothing.
Tonight I was supposed to attend a meeting of what I have deemed a tenants revolt. A group of tenants discussing a go forward plan against the property owner of the building for inadequate services and delays in construction. I should have gone but as my day progressed I cared less and less about anything. I sent my regrets. I planned to come home, flop on the couch and eat pizza pops in front of the tv until I fell asleep.
Lucky for me a friend texted me on the way home and so I chose to go out for dinner at my favourite Mexican place with him instead of my couch/pizza pop plan.
I’m not exactly waving Pom poms around but I do feel a little better. Thank you friend.

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