That probably seems like a peculiar number but it made sense to me. I was speaking with a coworker today who is about 20 years my senior about our job and it’s effect on our mental health. We talked about the times when we feel we just can’t go on and sometimes have trouble getting out of bed. I feel like I’ve passed that bump but others are just arriving there. We focused on the good things and right now and the best thing for her was that for the first time in her life she was able to do 18 push-ups. To her face I praised her and kept on about her accomplishments but in my head I thought she’s 23 years older than me, I should be able to do 18 damn push-ups. I waited all day to start. I psyched myself up for the event, took a deep breath and got down to it. I made it to four before half heartedly yelling “oh god” and collapsing to the floor. I have a problem. That problem is called I eat shitty foods and don’t go to the gym.
Today work went well. I was in a meeting this afternoon where I knew that as usual my opinion was not a popular one. I was certain that I was making everyone annoyed by the sound of my voice but after the meeting the director thanked me for my honesty and efficiency. It’s kind of funny because there was a time not so long ago that I didn’t want to go to work because I couldn’t handle it. Now it seems like I don’t want to come home because I can’t handle it. Life, sometimes you a crazy bitch.