November 2, 2014: ask your husband about his girlfriend

One likes to believe that at the end of a relationship their partner will be so distraught at losing you, such a fantastic catch, that they will never ever find anyone as awesome as you. That partner may possibly remain single for all eternity because you are so great that they can never find anyone even remotely comparable. That is a lie. A lie that separated people like to tell themselves to make them feel better.
Tonight I asked my husband about his girlfriend. What was her name? What did she look like? Do I know her?
He would tell me absolutely nothing. Not a name. Not a facial feature or a personality detail. Nothing. While its best imagined that she didn’t exist at all, it’s second best imagined that she was kind, funny and pretty. I’d like to think that he has certain standards. Clearly she could never be as amazing as me, but maybe a runner up. I wonder if we would be friends. Maybe we already are friends. Jesus.
I guess I’ll never know because he is as tight lipped as Kim Jong-Il on a forkful of cake. Do you think you’re better than me? Yeah, you probably are.
On another note, I’m super into pictures of mushrooms and snails right now. If I could find a photography book of snails on mushrooms I could die happy.

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